Wednesday, 17 October 2012

Le Freak, c'est Chic

I'm writing this post a couple of days after leaving Chicago so details are a bit hazy. Here's the stuff I can remember:

1. Drinking $5 martinis with elderly Republicans at a suburban bar called Black Steer. Mick and Marlene* were exactly what you'd imagine suburban Americunts to be. After making racial slurs about Mexicans and muslims and attacking Obama (the hottest man in politics), Mick presented me with the address of a shooting range and made me pinky promise to send him a postcard from bible-belt country. Lad.

2. Eating a crabcake burger in a PRETZEL bun. It was delicious; chewy and salty but without feeling disgustingly heavy. Move aside, brioche.

3. Standing underneath 'The Bean' or 'Cloud Gate' in Millennium Park. It's a steel installation by Anish Kapoor that resembles a giant silver coffee bean. Perfect for looking at the reflections of Chicago's skyscrapers.

4. Eating a deep dish pepperoni pizza on Navy Pier. Law in Chicagotown.

5. The spectacular view across Lake Michigan from the Signature Room. Lake is a bit of an understatement, I'm fairly sure you could fit the whole of England into that area, maybe even squeeze Wales in too. On a clear day you can see five States. It's dazzlingly high. I don't know how window cleaners do it.
I found the best view was right outside the ladies toilet cubicles, where after you've finished your business, the door opens out in front of floor-to-ceiling glass windows and you can spot the rich and restless frolicking in their heated rooftop pools.

*names have been altered to censor the racist, right-wing and downright ridiculous.

1 comment:

  1. Darling, you really mustn't pepper your prose with such crude and vulgar coinage.